Animals Force-fed Antidepressants

Beyond those animals being tortured in Pharma laboratories are those animals who have no choice freely prescribed prescription drugs at astronomical rates! Below is the comment on this video I posted a few days ago on the prescribing of antidepressants to animal’s. Most remain unaware that animals are prescribed far more drugs than humans. (Something those of you continuing to eat meat while working to regain your health and detox after the use of antidepressants need to ponder.)
“Before I make my comment allow me to state that I have specialized in the drugs this poor dog is being given and testifying in court cases against the drugs both to the FDA and in criminal cases involving these drugs for almost three decades. I have also been working to get them off the market with the doctor whose research was used to make them possible, yet came out against them in 1997 calling the drugs “monsters” and saying she wished she had never had anything to do with their development. I have also done media interviews with the doctor who admittedly BRIBED the approval of these drugs when he worked for Pharma who paid to bribe that approval! He too (You can find all that documentation on our website at
“Was this dog abused?! Whatever the abuse was, the abuse she is suffering now from that “behavioral vet” has to be far worse than anything she may have ever had before! Putting her on multiple medications (call them what they really are – drugs!) is little different than confining her to Auschwitz!!! The abuse is now mental and emotional, on top of physical, as she goes in and out of withdrawal from powerful mind altering drugs as with this vet switching her meds – a withdrawal humans report is at least 10 times worse than heroin withdrawal!!!
“Poor innocent thing! As if she did not suffer enough abuse already! Now if someone will VERY GRADUALLY, VERY, VERY GRADUALLY (taking months, not days or weeks after a year of being drugged wean her safely down off those drugs she will begin to go outside, get rid of her anxiety (since all these drugs CAUSE or increase anxiety), not cure it, and she will become a happy, healthy, normal dog! Our website at has an MP3 “Help! I Can’t Get Off My Antidepressant!) on how to wean safely & how to calculate how long someone needs to take to do so safely.
“With these drugs producing  a side effect like biting…these drugs could get her euthanized. Biting is common in humans on the drugs so how much greater a reaction would it be for a dog? Years ago the President of France was sent to the hospital after being badly bitten by his pet poodle on Prozac.
“And to show you how bad it can really get another early case involving Prozac was that of a respected Stanford professor who nearly killed her mother by taking over 20 bites out of her and answering the door for police with dried blood down her face and all down the front of her after only two weeks on Prozac!
“All antidepressants and benzodiazepines work the same upon serotonin to produce this aggressive effect. Remember Travis the TV star chimp suffering from Lymes Disease and put on Xanax? The well trained family pet went everywhere with his owners but after recently being prescribed Xanax bit off a woman’s hands and a large portion of her face before being killed by police in a effort to stop him! (2009/02/17/chimpanzee-attacks-mauls-connecticut-woman-before-being-killed-by-police.html)
“Here is a website database with about 5000 similar cases including most all school shootings: www.SSRIstories.NET. Please take a look at that list and then ask yourself how many times we as a society need to stick our hand in fire in order to realize it burns?! These drugs are a death sentence physically as well as mentally and emotionally. Just two weeks ago one of the most extensive studies I have seen demonstrated that antidepressants increase one’enhances of death by 33% and increase the rate of heart attack and stroke by 14%.
“I have seen so many humans suffer for years  due to the adverse effects of these  drugs  that the thought  of a poor helpless animal going through that kind of torture due to forced drugging just turns my stomach! If I were her I would be taking a chunk out of that “behavioral veterinarian”! Maybe someone in one of our many groups who are all trying to somehow find a way to get off of these drugs and put their life back together could take her and they could go through withdrawal together as a support system for each other. What a sad, sad state of affairs for our world!”

Medical Professionals Killing Others in Murder/Suicides

I have long stated that various types of medical professionals and their family members are largest single group facing serious reactions to antidepressants. With their easy access to medications and their strong belief in them we find a high use among them. One psychiatric nurse out of Iowa said publicly that 75% of the doctors and nurses she worked with were taking antidepressants. She said the drug reps are telling doctors and nurses that they are in stressful professions and the “depression” is going to hit them sooner or later so they may as well get started on antidepressants now to sort of “nip it in the bud” as they say. And apparently they are falling hard for that old sales pitch!

While searching for a particular murder/suicide case online the other day I ran across one case after another, after another, of murder/suicide situations involving medical professionals or family members of medical professionals and thought I would share with you what I see so often…..

WARNING: In sharing this information about adverse reactions to antidepressants I always recommend that you also give reference to my CD on safe withdrawal, Help! I Can’t Get Off My Antidepressant!, so that we do not have more people dropping off these drugs too quickly – a move which I have warned from the beginning can be even more dangerous than staying on the drugs!

The FDA also now warns that any abrupt change in dose of an antidepressant can produce suicide, hostility or psychosis. And these reactions can either come on very rapidly or even be delayed for months depending upon the adverse effects upon sleep patterns when the withdrawal is rapid! You can find the CD on safe and effective withdrawal helps here:

Ann Blake Tracy, Executive Director,
International Coalition for Drug Awareness &
Author: ”Prozac: Panacea or Pandora? – Our Serotonin Nightmare – The Complete Truth of the Full Impact of Antidepressants Upon Us & Our World” & Withdrawal CD “Help! I Can’t Get Off My Antidepressant!”

Victoria Vovchik



NOTE: “It is still unclear whether Vovchik’s psychiatric history had an impact of her decision.” and “Family friends: Suicidal New City woman snapped.”

Posted by Doris on March 2, 2013 at 12:09 pm

Mom Stabs Daughter & Kills Self

Dr. Victoria Vovchik from New City, New York killed herself after allegedly stabbing her seven year old daughter and leaving a gory scene for the girl’s father to find!

Reports say that the mother was obsessed with her baby’s daddy and although they did not live together and he is recently widowed he did co-own the house and was allegedly leading her on.

Officials said the young girl had been stabbed 31 times, including across the throat, and was rushed to Westchester Medical Center, where she is listed in critical condition.

Story Below:
The woman who slashed her 7-year-old daughter more than 30 times before killing herself Thursday was a devoted mother who was “obsessed” with the man who fathered the girl and hoped he would marry her one day, a former landlord told The Journal News.

Victoria Vovchik, a 45-year-old podiatrist, slit her throat after stabbing her daughter in an attempt to kill her in the master bedroom of their Quarry Road home, authorities said Friday.

The woman’s death was ruled a suicide Friday by acting Medical Examiner Dr. Laura Carbone.

Her daughter, Ava, was in stable condition at Westchester Medical Center in Valhalla on Friday.

Investigators don’t know how long the mother and child remained in the bloody bedroom before they were discovered by Ava’s father, Dr. Kristappa Sangavaram, an anesthesiologist, who called 911 at 1:09 p.m. Thursday.

Before moving to the home in 2010, Vovchik lived in a rented home on Strawtown Road in New City.

Her landlady, Carol Huggins, described her as a devoted mother who was convinced that Sangavaram would marry her someday.

Huggins never saw Sangavaram but said Vovchik was deeply in love with him.

“She was obsessed, and he was just leading her on and on … I was concerned for her,” Huggins said. “She was totally in love, she was hoping that he would eventually be with her.”

Vovchik filled the backyard with expensive playground equipment and enrolled the child in Indian language and dance classes so she would learn her father’s culture, Huggins said.

“She talked about him all the time, and she would not even look at another man,” Huggins said. “When she gave her heart, she gave it forever.

I was concerned for her. I never met this man, but he was supposed to visit her once in a while, but she saw him less and less.

“Victoria would never have done this if she was in complete control of herself. Something terrible must have happened to her emotionally, for her to crack,” she said.

Aside from two self-inflicted incisions to her neck, Vovchik “had no other bodily injuries,” and toxicology results will not be available for several weeks, according to the medical examiner.

nvestigators are trying to figure out what led Vovchik to commit the violence.

“Maybe the little girl can shed some light on what happened for us when she’s healthy enough to talk to us,” Clarkstown police Sgt. Jo Anne Fratianni said. “It’s like putting a piece of the puzzle back together.”

She said police had never been called to the home for any domestic issue.

Sangavaram went to the house he co-owned with Vovchik after the Woodglen Elementary School nurse called him about his daughter’s absence from school Thursday.

Sangavaram, a widower since last year, lives in New Jersey, where he runs a restaurant.

Woodglen’s principal hosted a meeting with parents Friday afternoon. Support staff was in classrooms to help children and teachers.

“It’s a really sad, sad tragic event,” PTA co-president Jessica Fetterman said. “I don’t really know the family. It’s scary that this happened.”

At the meeting, parents discussed how they would respond if their children asked about the stabbing.

They also volunteered to help Ava’s family in any way, but were told to hold off until she was out of the woods, said Joseph Malgieri, Clarkstown school board president.

Richard Weiner, a Montvale, N.J., podiatrist who sold his Fort Lee practice to Vovchik six years ago, said he was shocked by the news of her murder attempt and suicide because he knew her only as pleasant and likable.

“I tried to introduce her to the (Fort Lee) community. She was personable and was knowledgeable in her profession,” Weiner said.

He said she seemed busy whenever he saw her but that she closed her practice last year. She was looking for a group practice to join, he said.

Vovchik may previously have been a nurse, New Jersey records indicate.

She had been licensed to practice podiatry in New York since 1997 and in New Jersey in 2003, records show.

There are recent local cases of women accused of killing their children.

Manuela Morgado of Mamaroneck was accused of killing her 4-year-old son in October and has pleaded not guilty to second-degree murder.

In 2011, former Spring Valley resident LaShanda Armstrong, 25, killed herself and three of her children when she drove down a Newburgh boat launch into the Hudson River. Her eldest son swam to safety.

Source: Lohud

Friends of Victoria Vovchik disclose insight into attempted murder-suicide
Published: March 1, 2013 8:36 AM

Family friends: Suicidal New City woman snapped (3/1/13)

NEW CITY – Friends of the New City woman who attempted to murder her daughter before killing herself have disclosed possible insight into what prompted her actions.
According to police, 45-year-old Dr. Victoria Vovchik, a podiatrist, stabbed her daughter, Ava Sangavaram, in their home on Quarry Drive yesterday. Clarkstown police say the girl’s father, Dr. Kristappa Sangavaram, discovered the bloody scene and called 911 after being notified by a nurse at Woodglen Elementary School that his daughter was not in class.
When officers arrived, they found both mother and daughter in the master bedroom. According to police, Vovchik was dead and the girl was conscious, but suffering from multiple stab wounds. Her throat had also been slashed.
However, family friends told Newsday Westchester that Sangavaram, who was never married to Vovchik, had recently lost his wife and refused to marry Vovchik despite her advances. This, they say, may have caused her to snap.

It is still unclear whether Vovchik’s psychiatric history had an impact of her decision.

Meanwhile, once Ava is healthy enough, authorities say they plan on questioning her to possibly determine a motive in the attack.\


Maria Morgado2


Manuela Morgado


NOTE CLUES OF MED USE: From the pictures the look in her eyes early in the marriage and after where it appears all zest for life is now gone. Also notice the bloating in the later picture as opposed to the previous picture. Bloating is one of the most frequent reactions to antidepressants. Considering the attempted overdose on Xanax she may have been in withdrawal from an antidepressant and given Xanax to cope.


New court papers released in killing of 4-year-old
Published: April 9, 2013 5:32 PM

Newly released court documents detail the final moments of a 4-year-old’s life shortly before his mother killed him. Court papers show Manuela Morgado was determined to kill her son Jake, telling him she loved him over and over as she ended his life. Morgado reportedly taped the boy’s arms and legs, trying in vain to drug him and suffocate him with helium before ultimately choking him to death in their Mamaroneck home last October. (April 9, 2013) (4/9/13)

MAMARONECK – Newly released court documents detail the final moments of a 4-year-old’s life shortly before his mother killed him.
Court papers show Manuela Morgado was determined to kill her son Jake, telling him she loved him over and over as she ended his life. Morgado reportedly taped the boy’s arms and legs, trying in vain to drug him and suffocate him with helium before ultimately choking him to death last October.
The papers show Jake Morgado reportedly fought back until he stopped breathing. He was found dead on the morning of Oct. 1, lying next to his semiconscious mother, who had overdosed on Xanax after the incident.
Read More: Westchester Top Stories
Morgado was in the middle of a bitter custody dispute with Jake Morgado’s father, Timothy Reish, a prominent orthopedic surgeon.

Jealous Mother Kills Son Because She Was Jilted by Husband
By Ghana News

June 16, 2013

Manuela Maria Morgado

A New York mother killed her little boy before attempting to commit suicide after the child’s father reunited with his former wife, according to reports.

The Westchester County woman, caught in a custody battle over her 4-year-old son, killed the child before a failed suicide attempt in her suburban condominium, authorities said.

A dejected Manuela Maria Morgado was found semi-conscious and strangling the child’s dead body when police arrived at her home Monday morning. The police were called by a nervous family member, and found the mother and son Jason inside a room on the third floor, officials said.

Morgado, 46, tried to take an overdose of pills after taking the life of her son, a source told the news media.

Authorities did not say how the mother killed the child. Morgado was charged with second-degree murder, who apparently left suicide notes in the house.

The distraught father, Manhattan sports orthopedist Dr. Timothy Reish, came to the home Monday afternoon after the gruesome discovery by police.

Reish, 43, was involved in what looked like a fairly run-of-the-mill legal battle over the child before the mother’s murderous collapse, officials said.

There was no evidence of a threat to the child during the custody battle, authorities said.

Morgado, after an initial assessment at Sound Shore Medical Center in New Rochelle, was indicted in Mamaroneck Village Court and jailed pending a court date Thursday. A neighbor said the child and mother were nice people who never bothered anyone in the apartment building. The child’s father has recently reunited with his former wife, according to police.



Dr, John Brickman Wall

Dr. John Brickman Wall

“‘I don’t know. If I did, I don’t know. Only a monster would do these things,’

Doctor charged with murder in death of wife.

Pelle Wall, 18, had asked a juvenile court judge to remove his three siblings — ages 16, 13 and 11 — from his father’s home until a criminal investigation surrounding his father is completed.

Pelle’s mother, Uta von Schwedler, was found dead in her bathtub on Sept. 27, 2011. Because of the mysterious circumstances surrounding her death — including the medical examiner not being able to determine if the death was the result of homicide or suicide — Salt Lake police are conducting a criminal investigation. Friends and family members of von Schwedler believe her ex-husband, John Brickman Wall, is the key suspect.

Wall and von Schwedler divorced in 2006, but a bitter custody battle continued until the day she was found dead.

Pelle Wall, who was living in his father’s house at the time of his mother’s death, said in court documents that he was “so fearful for his physical safety around his father he has, on occasion, armed himself with knives.” He moved out of his father’s house when he turned 18 and later filed a petition in court to have his siblings removed from the house, saying he was concerned about their safety and that they were “suffering physical, emotional or development injury or damage.”



Doctor goes to trial for murder in wife’s death

With the month long trial of a Utah County doctor accused of murdering his wife just two weeks away, a 4th District judge began ruling on a litany of pretrial motions Monday.

Martin MacNeill, 57, is charged with murder, a first-degree felony, and obstruction of justice, a second-degree felony, in the April 11, 2007, death of his wife, 50-year-old Michele MacNeill.




Note: Thank you so very much to Nick Cole for sharing this most important information on the dangers of cold turkey withdrawal from these deadly mind altering medications!!!! As we have warned for two decades coming off these drugs too quickly can even be worse than staying them! (And if you have educated yourself on the effects of these drugs you know how deadly staying on them can be!)

Three years ago today, I checked myself into rehab for prescribed iatrogenic benzodiazepine and psych drug dependence. Not knowing any better and without support to come off of the drugs (that I finally KNEW were the cause of all my years of illness) from my doctor, I allowed them to cold-turkey me from six psychiatric drugs (Klonopin, Xanax, Ambien, Remeron, Seroquel, Adderall). Within months, I was suicidal and psychotic and could no longer cope in that condition.

Going to rehab was the second biggest mistake in my life; the first was ever taking this poison in the first place. They treated me horribly, like a street-junkie and called me an addict, forced me to AA/NA meetings – for medications that my doctor prescribed for me and told me to take regularly for my supposed “mental illness”. What they did to me was criminal, barbaric and medically unsound.

I attempted to reinstate the benzo only (I stayed off of the others) to taper with minimal success, as 4 months had passed in the cold-turkey state and the drugs don’t always work again that far off from a CT. I tapered off of the Valium that I reinstated and have been off for almost 10 months.

Everyday is still a living hell where I’m bed-bound for the majority of the day. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone (except maybe the psychiatrist who is responsible for this inhumane suffering). I am in severe pain, have DP/DR, cognitive dysfunction, a sensation that I’m “on a boat out to sea”, nausea, blurred vision, mood swings, depression and a plethora of other debilitating symptoms with no end in sight. I can barely physically take care of myself and I live alone with no in-person support. I cannot work. I lost my home, my friends, my family and everything that was of any value to me, other than my life which I came scarily close to losing too.

PLEASE DO NOT allow anyone to cold-turkey you from psychiatric drugs. You will be at risk for a severe, protracted withdrawal syndrome that could last for YEARS. Do your research and homework and find someone who has knowledge of tapering these medications to guide you. If your doctor tries to rush you off of your medications- FIND ANOTHER DOCTOR that will support you in a slow taper at a speed your body can tolerate.

I can only hope that with more time I will see more improvements and functionality. Psychiatric drugs are toxic poison which disable the brain and CNS.

The worst part is that I didn’t need ANY of these medications. I allowed a doctor to label me, to drug me and to destroy my life over “work-related stress” which spiraled into polydrugging with multiple psych meds because the more drugs that were added, the more I experienced tolerance and side effects that were MISdiagnosed by a pill-pushing psychiatrist as “mental illness”. It can happen SO easily to anyone who’s vulnerable, trusting and uneducated about the destructive nature of these medications. I thought the same as SO many other psych drug victims- “Surely, my doctor wouldn’t prescribe me something harmful”. I was very terribly WRONG. And when I became sick from the medication, the medical community not only abandoned me as a patient but blamed me for my own suffering.

It is my hope that before I die that we see the “psychiatric drug bubble” burst and the truth revealed about these noxious poisons that are being handed out all over the world to innocent unsuspecting people and children. Until then, I will not give up. I will fight to continue to spread the word about these drugs and the people who prescribe them. And I will continue to fight to reclaim my health that was unfairly stolen from me.

Thank you to everyone in the psych drug withdrawal communities online who have befriended me, supported me and loved me when the rest of the world turned their backs on me, blamed me and wrote me off as “mentally ill” or “not trying hard enough”. Thank you for your validation and for sharing your stories and experiences so candidly so that others can learn from you and not make the same mistakes. All of you are the biggest warriors I have ever met. I wouldn’t be alive today without your support and friendship. You know who you are and I am so grateful for you.

For anyone going through this – keep going. I’m told we all recover and heal with time. As hard as it is, it has to be worth it to be medication-free and healthy; out from underneath the control of doctors and their “medicines”.

Peace and continued healing to each and everyone of you. Much love.

You never know what you’re gonna get…Thank you Psychiatry and Big Pharma. For turning me into a tripolar MESS.

Nick Cole

WARNING: In sharing this information about adverse reactions to antidepressants and dangers of cold turkey withdrawal any mind altering medication I always recommend that you also give reference to my CD on safe withdrawal, Help! I Can’t Get Off My Antidepressant [or Benzo, or Atypical Antipsychotic]!, so that we do not have more people dropping off these drugs too quickly – a move which I have warned from the beginning can be even more dangerous than staying on the drugs! Done correctly withdrawal does not have to be painful and dangerous.

The FDA also now warns that any abrupt change in dose of an antidepressant can produce suicide, hostility or psychosis. And these withdrawal reactions can either come on very rapidly or even be delayed for months depending upon the adverse effects upon sleep patterns due to the rapid withdrawal!

You can find the CD on safe and effective withdrawal helps here:

Ann Blake Tracy, Executive Director,
International Coalition for Drug Awareness &
Author: ”Prozac: Panacea or Pandora? – Our Serotonin Nightmare – The Complete Truth of the Full Impact of Antidepressants Upon Us & Our World” & Withdrawal CD “Help! I Can’t Get Off My Antidepressant!”

Xanax Facts and Whitney Houston

I have to agree with Dr. Peter Breggin on this article & would encourage you to read it & educate yourself about this drug.

But what I would add that was not addressed here is how often Xanax is prescribed in antidepressant withdrawal thereby causing Xanax to take responsibility for what the antidepressant withdrawal actually caused or exacerbated the effects. If that is a possibility in Whitney Houston’s case we do not know because that information has not been shared & is rarely addressed or considered.

Another important issue not addressed here is that Ambien is in this same group of drugs & most are aware of the very serious problems with this Benzo.

Also when Xanax was introduced to the market ~ supposedly to replace its extremely addictive sister drug, Valium ~ it is amazing to see it made it to approval when you consider that 1/3 of those in the clinical trials for Xanax could not withdraw from this drug due to its extremely addictive properties!!!

Reports that Xanax and other benzos are not usually lethal when taken alone are vastly misleading. Xanax is rarely taken alone. Why? Because as much or more than any other prescribed drug, Xanax causes medication spellbinding.


Lori Heitman
I was on Cymbalta 90 mg for approximately 4 years. During this time I was also prescribed Temazepam for sleep and Xanax .05 prn for anxiety. I took everything as prescribed but was noticing side effects, such as ”brain zaps” after a late or missed dose. I knew something was wrong but did not know how to go about getting off Cymbalta.
In June 2008 my son found me unconscious on the kitchen floor, with a suicide note at my side. He called 911, but hid the suicide note. This was the start of a 15 day nightmare in the local hospital’s ICU. I was not breathing on arrival & had to be put on a ventilator for two days minimum. From here the details are not clear to me. The hospital called in an addiction specialist, I believe they did a rapid detox with Ativan. This only made me sicker. I was still in the ICU, suffering from extreme hallucinations while i was getting visited from friends and family. I have never been so embarrassed in my life. I was told that on several accounts that my requests for basic needs were denied because I was ”crazy”. When they finally got me off Ativan, I was sent to the psychiatric floor for approximately 36 hours. Upon my release the psychiatrist told me to go home and continue on the medication. The same medication which they had detoxed me for only I knew better and now am completely drug free and have never felt better. I have since tried to get answers about my ordeal, but haave hit a brick wall. Several doctors have told me to forget about it, one local psychiatrist even told me that I should let him hypnotize me so i would forget about the whole ordeal. I would just like my story to be documented in hopes that it might prevent someone else from going through such a horrible ordeal.

PROZAC: Woman Threatens State Patrolman: Missouri

HOW SAD!!! Reminds me of a talk I had with parents in Louisiana just last week who are completely overwhelmed dealing with a daughter with similar problems – ALL BECAUSE OF THE WIDESPREAD PRESCRIBING OF THESE DEADLY AND VERY ADDICTIVE PRESCRIPTION DRUGS!!!! They know she can get them from just about any doctor around.
Doctors have truly become our biggest drug pushers in this country! What on earth are we doing to our children?!!! How can so many families be left alone to deal with this – never knowing from one minute to the next if they are going to find their child unresponsive and dying due to yet another overdose of these drugs?
This country is in SO MUCH trouble and it has NOTHING to do with any outside threat to our nation – it is within.
Ann Blake-Tracy, Executive Director,
International Coalition for Drug Awareness
Author: Prozac (ETC): Panacea or Pandora? – Our
Serotonin Nightmare! & Audio: Help! I Can’t Get Off
My Antidepressant/Antipsychotic, ect. ()
Paragraphs three & four read:  “According to the criminal complaint, when Parsley made contact with West  ‘her speech was slurred and her eyes were bloodshot and glassy.’  He adds that he did not notice an odor of intoxicants on her.”SSRI Stories note:  “


“West reportedly admitted she had taken Xanax and Prozac at 6 a.m. After failing sobriety tests, West was placed under arrest.”

Hostility”  is listed as an Infrequent, but not Rare, reaction to Prozac in the Physicians Desk Reference.

Paxil: Iraq War Vet Suicidal: Holds Police At Bay for 9 Hours: Michigan

Note from Ann Blake-Tracy: Yet another suicidal vet who first overdosed on his
antidepressant and Xanax and then became homicidal enough that he was going
to shoot police – often in an attempt to commit what is now called suicide
by cop. These drugs produce both suicide and violence as we see once again
in this case.

First three sentences read: "A suicidal veteran who held Howell Police at
bay for more than nine hours Thursday night into early this morning is
hospitalized and undergoing psychiatric evaluation. Howell Police Chief George
Basar says that just before 6 oâ

A Meridia Tragedy

“I wouldn’’t have risked my health or my life if I knew the damage it could cause.”


I started Meridia on 2/2/01 and ended taking it on 3/18/01. The following will tell what happened to me.

After having my two children, I felt the need to shed a few pounds. I was energetic and very healthy. I went to my family physician and he gave me a complete health physical, an EKG, and blood work. I was told I was in good health and was given the Meridia prescription.

I began taking Meridia, 10 mg. and within a few days I started feeling muscle pain in my shoulders. Over the next few days, the pain went into my wrists and hand. I then had weakness in my arms which got so bad that I was unable to use my arms and hand at al. When I went to my 1st monthly appointment to renew my prescription, I complained of pain and weakness of my and hands. I was told it couldn’’t be Meridia, that the pain and weakness was probably due to the cold and snowy weather. I was frustrated and scared. Without the use of m arms and hands, I was unable to care for my one year old baby boy and my four year old little girl. I had family and friends helping me with everything. My husband couldn’’t understand what ha happened in such a short time.

Things only got worse. Within the next few weeks, the muscle pain and weakness began in my legs. I then went to my doctor and gave him an enormous list of adverse reactions such as: muscle weakness, numbness of arms and legs extreme fatigue, memory loss/confusion, extreme menstrual cramping, etc. The list had no end. My doctor was overwhelmed. Blood was taken and I was told to stay on Meridia and wait a few days for results from blood work. In 2 days, I was in the ER unable to use my arms and les and extremely fatigued. I stopped Meridia that day.

The hospital gave me an I.V. and Demerol (for 3 days). I received a CT Scan, MRI, blood work (day and night). Nothing was found. no MS, no lupus, NOTHING. They said I could go home when I could walk with assistance. I left the hospital with very limited use of my body.

Over the next few months, I felt like a guinea pig, taking several medications and nothing seemed to help. I had no muscle strength. To add to the pain and weakness, other symptoms began to happen. Dizzy spells and falling (always forward) blurry vision, loss of memory, extreme nervousness and insomnia. Doctors started prescribing Xanax because I was too anxious. No one seemed to know how to help me. No wonder I was anxious.

I was unable to function around my children. Mommy wasn’’t Mommy anymore.

I learned that most of these side effects were from stopping Meridia, cold turkey. Have bounced from doctor to doctor and haven’t received help for my continuous conditions. I have been told that I have a severe, unclassical case of rheumatoid arthritis, an auto-immune disease (for life). I have been stripped of my healthy immune system. My body broke down and I will never be able to reverse this condition.

It has been a year since I began this life change. I struggle daily to move and function in my daily life. I still have severe swelling, pain and weakness in muscles and joints. I am limited with the use of my hands and I can only stand 10-15 minutes at a time.

I am only 33 years old and have my husband and 58 year old parents taking care of me and my children.

I feel that my life has been altered unfairly as I was very uninformed about Meridia and wouldn’’t have risked my health or my life if I knew the damage it could cause.

Just recently, I was diagnosed with a TIA (Stroke) just in the past few months. I found my speech slurred and my left side went numb.

Can anyone tell me what is going on with my body and health. I now live in fear that I may have another stroke or even worse.

Every dream I ever had as a woman, mother and a professional has been lost. Meridia has ruined my life as well as my family’s.

It is obvious that Meridia had something to do with my immune system breakdown. IT SHOULD NEVER HAVE HAPPENED!!

Thank you for taking time to read my story. I hope by releasing this information to you, that others may be helped.

Lisa Bell



This is Survivor Story number 30.
Total number of stories in current database is 48

Samples of Zoloft and Xanax turn Brother into Criminal

I am unforgiving of a medical profession who cares so little for the very human beings that they swore to help.”


After 9 long and horrible years you cannot know the relief that I am feeling after reading about all the experiences that I have read tonight.

My brother is currently serving a twenty-year sentence for a crime so completely and totally out of character for him that I am still astounded.

This was a young man who could be considered irresponsible and unmotivated at worst, at least until he started taking the prescription drugs Zoloft and Xanax.

After a period of depression that I knew then and know now to have been brought on my a sense of low self esteem my brother went to a doctor he had never been to before and explained how he was feeling. This doctor determined in less than thirty minutes of knowing my brother that what he had was “a chemical imbalance in his brain”. This man sent him home with an entire sample box of Zoloft and an entire box of Xanax. He promised my brother that he would be a brand new man in three months. He did not lie. Three months later my brother was someone that I did not know.

Buddy Joe never drank, ever. He just didn’t like it. Yet after taking the drugs for a while he began to crave alcohol. He started introducing himself to new people using the name Austin. When we questioned him he would say that he just liked the name better. He was never, and I want to stress the never part, violent. So what he was becoming was an agitated alcoholic named Austin.

He had been out all night drinking and I later learned through friends acting extremely wild. He came home and committed a crime that I still find too difficult to actually go into. He says he remembers that night like a strobe light blinking off and on in his head.

I have spent nine years knowing that the Zoloft was behind the events leading up to that night and I am so thankful to have read the different stories sent in by so many people with different and yet similar experiences.

My heart breaks for those who have lost those that they love to the horrors of these medications. But I am unforgiving of a medical profession who cares so little for the very human beings that they swore to help.

Thank you all for sharing your stories.


Annette Royce



This is Survivor Story number 31.
Total number of stories in current database is 48

Paxil Prescribed for Fatigue

“I can remember it being hard to feel a smile.”


My name is Barton Mahoney. Thank you for this forum. It represents an opportunity to know that others understand what I experienced with the drug Paxil.

Bad, bad, bad for Bart! It has been a lonely experience in explaining the affects this intrusive drug has had in my life. I am one of those people that this drug was not designed for, doing it only by a doctor’s order. If I only knew what was in store for me, assuredly it would never have happened. It was prescribed not so much for depression as to help with an extreme case of fatigue. Depression and fatigue can appear hand-in-hand when working 80+ hour workweeks in construction. As an energetic and conscientious building contractor this is now my previous occupation.

Paxil, smaxil, serotonin, shmerotonin. I had no idea of what these were or what they would mean, before it was too late. They prescribed it with Xanax, another wonder drug. Within the first week I was complaining to my doctor about the effect it was having on me. I was told my condition was consistent with the early affects of the drug. It was recommended to continue the medication for the 4-6 week incubation period when the Paxil would then become balanced with my system.

This never happened. I stopped the Xanax within months. My personality and character changed so dramatically that I left the construction trades, lost the respect of my family, along with every ounce of self-esteem that I had within a very short time. I can remember it being hard to feel a smile. It was the major contributing factor to the demise of a life once enjoyed, leading to the perils of a drug user. I wish this on no person. The scary part is that this was considered a legal practice.

I was hospitalized on several occasions during the first year. Each time was the result of collapsing on the floor or when lying down and not being able to get up. I would just lay there not able to move or with a feeling of not wanting to move. It is difficult to explain. If helped by a person and moved very slowly they could get me to my feet, only to immediately collapse again. Three times at home, Twice while at hotels, once on an airplane. That time they had to hold the flight I was on from taking off. It took better than a half an hour to retrieve me from the bathroom. Two very helpful Texas police officers saw our way to a hospital. I was treated in the emergency room but they wanted to take blood. With a phobia about shots plus being through this experience before I felt to have a better answer for my treatment. They did not understand that I just wanted to lie there and that I would be fine in a little while. I tried explaining my condition at the hospital and asked if they would please call my doctor. They did not make the call and released me because I refused treatment by not letting them stick needles in me. I took a later flight home and told myself that this was it. I had to get off this drug.

I was in the care of my doctor this entire period from September 1997 until November 1999. What is interesting was how the medical clinic provided me with prescriptions of Paxil even after I had lost my insurance (I lost everything but that’s not the point). My thinking was that they are giving me the medication because they know something may go wrong if I stopped taking it. Something was adrift for them to give me the medication for free. It appears I am discovering that they did know once this drug had taken its place in my system that it was a very long process to wean a person off the drug. Plus there was a possibility that I may not be stable enough for those around me. There was nothing about this on the drug description at the time, only to say do not stop medication without consulting your doctor. I did and was told to very slowly reduce the dosage until I could handle life without it. It took over a year to free myself from this consummate condition.

It has been a year and a half since my final battle with the drug. The final no-more-Paxil period lasted for about three weeks. No different than any other episode during this treatment, if I stopped or slowed down the medication I would lose my motor skills or would lose my will to use them. Slowly perking-up I am happy to say that now without this drug in my system and because of a very supporting family; I am back to my old self and am finding life enjoyable once again. The further life distances itself from the history of this period the better off I will be. Occasionally, I still have strange twinges at the base of my neck and I now shake when doing something tedious with my hands. I had always prided myself in the steadiness of intricate tasks, but this is no more.

My memories of this period are also quite bothersome. I have spoken with three attorneys, one said his legal counsel doctor said I should have been able to stop cold-turkey with out having any problems. Right! A second said it appeared to be a class-action suit after a 20-20 television show about the anti-affects of anti-depressant medication. A third attorney said it would cost more than his firm could afford just in getting the case to trial.

I left it at that knowing that I was greatly improved and able by nature to fight my way back to a life. My wife and I were married at age 15 & 16 respectively. We have three wonderful adult children. For 31 years we have been through many tough times and this is now just another experience. I don’t want to think of where my life would be if I hadn’t fought through and separated myself from the clutches of Paxil. Even thinking through this letter helps with the healing process. I was compelled to write because it appears the truth is coming out. Previously, I actually thought I was going crazy and that nobody was listening, nor would they believe me. It was the loneliest feeling in the world.

I am saddened by the actions of those people under the influence of this
drug. To have done the things that they have hurts all of us. To an extent I can understand how they felt when performing these horrific acts. My prayers and thoughts go out to all that are affected. These are all very disturbing conditions that to some extent fall on the shoulders of those that offer these treatments and to those who manufacturer the drugs that they prescribe. It is a dangerous business. These drugs which are administered do have an affect. I can claim adverse reactions if the person is not designed for treatment in such a manner. We all deserve more information, especially when it comes to a drug that effects our central nervous system.

For those who have had or are having similar experiences, you are not alone nor are you crazy. If you are thinking about taking an anti-depressant, discuss all possibilities with your doctor. If the medication is helping you, then you are lucky. I might still be enjoying a life once stable. Hopefully I will continue to overcome and in time will be fully restored. As I get older it will be interesting to see whether I will ever chance taking any medication. Never again do I want to go through this experience no matter what my condition may be. I would rather go natural.

Thank you for hearing my voice. Now that I have written this brief letter about my experience, I hope it will help others understand the dangers of drugs not meant for the masses. Still it hurts to the center of my soul when considering these possibilities. I have experienced Paxil. Communication is our strength and it should be critically applied with matters of health. Manufacturers, doctors and patients must have all possible information before making life-altering decisions. I signed no waivers in regards to potential side-affects which excuses my ignorance. Luckily I was strong enough to help myself. Woe to those who are not so lucky, you are at the mercy of questionable practices by those we should be able to trust.

Barton Mahoney



This is Survivor Story number 25.
Total number of stories in current database is 34