Running Away from Wellbutrin

I regret ever taking one pill of Wellbutrin.”

 

At first, I noticed the nervousness, where I would expect anything to startle me at every moment. When that passed, I was alright for several months.

My grades did not improve, and my friends started to notice my withdrawal from my usual outgoing self. I was becoming more introverted. When I actually became aware of the changes in the way my brain would function, I stopped taking the medication, and did not reveal this information to anyone. Since it is an accumulative medicine, which I was told I would only have to take until the age of 25, I just would hope and still do hope that it would just wear off eventually, and that the normal connections of mood generating neurons would be naturally restored.

To be more descriptive of my individual side-effects, I was feeling everything that I was prior to the medication, but at half the impact. For instance, my personal life with girlfriends and whatnot suffered drastically. I was unable to feel the compassion and love for them as I once did, and it had absolutely nothing to do with anything going wrong in the relationships. It’s with anything. I’ve become rather sullen – constantly, and uncontrollably melancholy at all times.

Every few months, for about one or two hours, I will all of a sudden feel all sorts of old feelings that I haven’t experienced years, or since before I began taking the medication. It comes with no warning or trigger, and fades in a similar fashion. These bursts only happen every few months, and never for more than about two hours at a time. I was so convinced of the negative effects the medication had taken on not only my thought processes, but my ability to feel emotion, that I ran away from home for good.

I wasn’t allowed to live with my mother unless I was taking Wellbutrin, and I am glad that I did what I had to, because I don’t even want to think about how much worse it could’ve been if I had continued on this medication. I don’t know exactly what happened to my brain, but I do know very well that I regret ever taking one pill of Wellbutrin. Maybe it works for some people, but I’m forced to believe that it prevents the brain from producing more effective healing chemicals that can do more than this synthetic misery pill that some parents are so unaware and uneducated of, and to which they will so readily approve their children to be prescribed such a horrible drug. like a lamb to the slaughter.

I’m sorry for my harshness, but I am strongly against all brain altering drugs. “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”

Seordin Anemeros
anemeros@yahoo.com

 

9/5/2002

This is Survivor Story number 12.
Total number of stories in current database is 48

Running Away from Wellbutrin

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