Zoloft Nightmare

“(Because of Zoloft) I was in prison and had lost my family, all of my property, my Ph.D.”

 

I am yet another individual whose life has been horribly disfigured by the drug Zoloft. My story is a very long one and I will not tell it all at this point but write of it in its entirety when my website is up some time in May of 03. The following is an abstract of sorts, a summary.

I began taking Zoloft in 1993. By 1996 I was in prison and had lost my family, all of my property, my Ph.D. (I was all but dissertation at the time of my arrest), my job, my reputation, and so on. I spent 6 years behind bars and was released in April of 2002. I will be on parole as a sex offender (I photographed my 15-year-old stepdaughter and her 15-year-old girlfriend) until 2016.

While in prison I was listening to a radio talk show, Cost-to-Coast, guest-hosted by the very talented Ian Punnett.

It was a Sunday, July 01, 2001. His guest was our own  Ann Blake Tracy. As she spoke I was amazed at the ramifications of what she was saying. I fit the pattern of someone who had succumbed to the drugs malevolent influences to a “t”. It was on that day that I first realized what had happened to me. It all became so clear! Five long years after my imprisonment I realized what had happened! May God bless and keep Ann Blake-Tracy.

My point in posting my story at this time is to see if there may be some way those of us who have had their lives destroyed by a drug can unite and file a class action lawsuit against the manufacturers of these drugs, Pfizer in my case. The statue of limitations has run out for me here in Arkansas. I only had two years to file for damages. But that is not acceptable to me and I want to pursue remedy. If there is any one of you who would like to try to pursue this please feel free to contact me at one of the following options.

I may be hard to reach for one reason or another (when I’m on line my home phone is busy, try the cell number) but please keep trying. There has got to be restitution for us in some way. My contact information is as follows: John E. Herndon, 13150 Nickels Rd., West Fork, AR 72774. Or e-mail me at- elwain@msntv.net.

Or phone me at home 479-839-3111, or cell 479-841-1661. There must be something we can do besides lament our tragedies on the web.

elwain@webtv.net
John Herndon

 

1/20/2003

This is Survivor Story number 2.
Total number of stories in current database is 77

 1,881 total views

Teenager Loses Creative Passion on Zoloft and Paxil

“Paxil almost made me go insane after just a few days.”

 

I’ve been looking for a site like this for a long time now-ever since I decided (thank God) to get off my antidepressant medication.

Ok, so I am a 17-year old male, right… When I first got to high school, my parents divorced so things were kind of a mess and for the first time in my life I had made “enemies.”

Well, that’s when I first started seeing a psychiatrist. We would talk and underlying everything that was discussed to make me “better” was a deep, conviction that I was so terribly shy and this needed to be cured.

So I tried Zoloft and Paxil, but went off them immediately after not even a week. I will say that the Paxil almost made me go insane after just a few days. Yes, it was against the doctor’s word to go off them. Thank God I did though. Then a while passed and this time I thought I truly needed help.

I had gotten into a fight at school and received threats from a lot of people. I was completely paranoid and my mom (and I gave in) put me in the mental hospital (for kids). Oh my God, this is where I had like my calling or whatever the hell I was thinking (hoping they could cure me so I would fit in and be my “old” self again).

I don’t even remember if all this is right because my memory is really screwed up now. But, so I went on Celexa this time and unfortunately, for good…I was sixteen at the time. I talking a lot more in class, my anxiety was gone, I got really into the stuff they were feeding me at school, and my reputation for a nice, respectable young man went down the tube. I guess it was my own doing. But I started wanting to be different from everybody else, but I was Zen-like, using the Bible (it’s cover) as an inspiration.

I think I had too much ADD to read the bible at the time-it was just a matter of calming my emotions. Ok, so mix these calming drugs with listening to the band Radiohead. Not cool at all. I lost my two best friends. I got full of myself because I had gotten accepted to an art school. But the summer between leaving my old school I started believing I was getting really close to my family. My Dad at least because he was (and still is) taking the same medication I was. But I would say anything that came to mind. I thought I was “better”…

Then art school started and I went from being a boring person with a vivid imagination that could be translated to paper (drawing) to a zombie who could only draw from observation. My concentration was really good but I had spurts of anger with anticipated culmination of disaster. I was a totally different person. I wasn’t self-conscious at all anymore, had no friends either. Then I saw something in the other people at that school that reminded me of the old-me (the one I didn’t like for some reason) that made me want to change.

“A beautiful mind”, “one flew over the cuckoo’s nest”- these movies made me realized I’d lost my artistic passion or whatever the hell I had before. A reason for living…

Well, yeah so then I went cold-turkey off the medication and slowly but surely went insane. It was not cool at all. I re-visited the past that I had tried to escape on medication. I thought I had lost the “holy spirit” though and this made me think about committing suicide. It was horrible. Before I would say such things to get attention but now I really felt it.

The bottom line is, do not believe that you have a depression that needs “correcting”. My God, that’s what I believed but then I realized it is just the devil doing his work. I have no life now really. I had lots of talent and potential and I think its all gone now because I thought I had a problem but really didn’t. Now when I hear these antidepressants being touted to save people or whatever, I have other thoughts. It’s hard for me to realize that I am my old self again. I had to piece back together my memory. It is better to be this way than a zombie on drugs though.

RtskooL@aol.com

 

5/4/2002

This is Survivor Story number 26.
Total number of stories in current database is 48

 1,474 total views