I want my doctor to go on Effexor for a few months. Then I want him withdrawn.
My physician prescribed Effexor because it was what he had the most samples of. I suffer from genetic depression. All members of my family have it. I have been on SSRIs since the early 80s. I hated Effexor from the start. I didnt realize I had some of the physical problems associated with taking it, but I knew it was hurting my mind. I tried over and over to get off of it ,but within a day I would be so weepy and dizzy, my thoughts stuck in endless circles of failure and regrets. I thought I was a hopeless depressive and quickly resumed the drug. I didnt know those were withdrawal symptoms.
Two weeks and one day ago I stopped Effexor. I knew that what it was doing to my head wasnt proper. I investigated natural means of increasing my serotonin levels and felt confident I could handle my depression without pharmaceuticals. Then I entered Hell.
Within 18 hours I was a total wreck, sobbing, dizzy, disconnected, sick. There are only flashes of the past 2 weeks. The unbearable brightness of day, the agony of any noise, the trippy feeling that didnt leave.
I hurt all over, I vomited, I became unbearably hot with sweat pouring out of me, and then shaking cold. Just today I found a fleece nightgown and a sweat suit near the bed. I wore these clothes under blankets when the weather was in the 90s with equal humidity. At times just holding my head up was nearly impossible. This was a sickness that changed me forever.
I went in as one person and came out a different one. The serendipitous and cavalier way in which this drug was prescribed enrages me. The boards kept me going through the worst of my withdrawal and gave me the information I needed in order to continue. The drug companies are using us all as guinea pigs. One thought dominated as I wept and ached and suffered, I want my doctor to go on Effexor for a few months. Then I want him withdrawn.
janiceash janice@gargoylefolk.com
6/25/2002
This is Survivor Story number 19.
Total number of stories in current database is 48
